Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Hair Styles of the Rich and Famous

So, you think Britney really shaved her head to escape the hair-strand drug test during the child-custody battle with kfed? You realize, of course, that her recently cut hair is for sale along with the clippers and a cig lighter she left behind. Kfed's lawyers can easily retrieve a strand of hair for drug tests--even if you are stupid enough to pay a million or two for the nasty stuff. Do you think she is just a child star, fallen victim to sudden fame and fortune? Here is a theory that is a little different from what most are guessing; Britney is the victim of subtle nuances of definition. What? Let me explain. Do you know the difference between class clown and comedian? The class clown is the person who will do anything on a dare. He/she is always getting into trouble but is willing to pay that price because even that draws attention and praise from a group that encourages the outlandish behavior. The comedian, on the other hand, stays below the radar and gets great satisfaction from CONVINCING the class clown that outlandish behavior is actually a great idea. Now apply these descriptions to Britney and her recent best friend Paris. What is it that makes these two best friends? Are they just alike? Hardly. Paris is sophisticated (even if she is given to some class clown tricks occasionally) and comes from a looong line of money and money-making. She clowns just enough to retain marketability. Britney has had two brief, foolish marriages. She has two children. She has a trailer-park background. They are very, very different--yet partying together regularly. Why? Maybe because Paris gets lots of entertainment from getting Britney to pull goofy stunts in public. Can you picture Paris with some of her rich friends whispering while Britney dances "I bet you I can get Brit to take off her panties and flash a crowd of paparazzi before we go home." "You think that is something? I got her to change her hair from blond to black and by the end of the night I can get her to shave her head completely!" "No way!" "Way!" "Watch this....Hey Brit, do you know that they can do drug tests using strands of hair that tell them if you have used drugs in the last 30 days? When is your custody hearing? Hey, I've got an idea....."
Nobody makes this decision and then goes for tattoo's and clubbing without some prodding.


Anonymous said...

Glad you finally got that off your chest!!!


Lerra said...

Either way, she's got some serious problems! I mean, I guess everyone is entitled to pick their own hairstyle, but come on. That's more of an Avril Lavigne style than a Britney Spears style.

Roxy Wishum said...

Maybe kfed was everything she wanted. They were meant to be, supposed to be, but they lost it. All the memories, so close to her, just fade away.
All this time he was pretending.
So much for her happy ending.
Oh oh, oh oh, oh oh...

auburnchica said...

Haha. Nice job with the Avril song there Mr. Roxy. I'm impressed.